APPROVED

Way down in Atlantic City now Greyhound ridin’, no complainin’ But the second I saw that hospital Lord, I needed assistance Rode that bus all the way from Tennessee Back stiff but it didn’t bother me Six state lines and a lukewarm Coke Didn’t say a word, didn’t even joke Lady said, Sir, you feel alright I said yes ma’am, I’m doin’ just fine tonight But we pulled in slow, I saw that glow, Red letters sayin’ “EMERGENCY”, below Driver said, last stop, end of the line I stood up straight with a little more pride But across that street, oh what a view I felt a little pressure I never knew Uber expensive Uber, don’t you make me walk I been ridin’ all day, now I can’t even talk Call 9-1-1, yeah I need that ride Take me cross the street, don’t leave my side Uber expensive Uber, lights flash bright Cost more than that bus I rode all night Could’ve took a cab, yeah I knew I should But this ride here’s lookin’ medically good Stepped off the bus, hit the curb just right Looked at that sign shinin’ in the night Felt that ache I ain’t never had Well… maybe once—but it weren’t that bad Pulled my phone from my pocket slow Dialed three numbers like a pro Yeah I need a unit, don’t delay I been hurtin’ now for… several days Dispatch said, sir where you at I said right by the sign, can’t miss that She said how long’s this been goin’ on I said well… since before the bus came along Uber expensive Uber, don’t make me try I ain’t walkin’ now, I might just die Call 9-1-1, bring the flashing lights I survived that bus but not these nights Uber expensive Uber, here they come Sirens singin’ like a bass drum Could’ve hailed a cab for a couple bucks But I got me a stretcher and some cardiac trucks Medic said, sir you rode all day Now you say your chest just gave away I said son, that bus was mighty tough But this sidewalk here’s a little too rough Looked at that stretcher, clean and sweet Ain’t no way I’m walkin’ across that street Uber expensive Uber, hear that siren cry Didn’t need it then, but I need it now From Tennessee to the ER gate Took me all day but I still ain’t late Uber expensive Uber, roll me through Front door service like I always knew If you see that sign when your ride is done Call 9-1-1 and hitch that one Rolled me ten feet, wheels still warm Said you’re stable, sir… no cause for alarm I tipped my hat with a crooked grin Said next time… I think I'm flyin’ in

This chart was electronically reviewed by Synthetic Medic Medical Center. Accuracy may vary depending on staffing, caffeine levels, and whether anyone actually read the note.