FINALIZED

“Dispatch to Engine One” Little laugh in her voice “Stand by for access instructions” (oh lawd) She say, Engine One Copy this, write it down slow Front door got a keypad Code one-two-four-oh Hit the green Then the pound It’ll blink real bright Try not to film it on your phone tonight (hey!) If that don’t open Don’t you pout, don’t you cuss Spare key sittin’ in the fake rock Left of the cactus Two steps off the walkway Little gray stone Give it a wiggle That house is blown wide open Open channel, open door I’m givin’ out secrets on the airwaves, sure Thief in his slippers takin’ notes on the floor Say it again dispatch What’s that code for the door (one more time) Open channel, open door I’m runnin’ a how-to home-invasion tour Just tryna help my crew That’s what I’m here for But everybody listening want a free room tour “Medic Two, you too You can get inside fast Garage pad busted So go ‘round the back Look under that barbecue Black box there Push three-three-seven The whole wall flare If y’all get stuck I got a ladder in the shed Behind the blue trash can by the flowerbed Drag it ‘round front Tap-tap on the glass Second window from the left That latch don’t catch” (uh-oh) Open channel, open door I’m givin’ out secrets on the airwaves, sure Guy in a hoodie with a spiral notepad Writing Use the alley That deadbolt bad (oh man) Open channel, open door Fire and EMS get a guided tour But half the neighborhood’s tuned in too Now every burglar know just what to do She say, all units be advised Dog’s name is Daisy She real kind Just scratch her ear She roll on her side Alarm panel code is four-four-nine-five Uh, dispatch, entire city just heard that She pause, then laugh Yeah, copy that If the thief get there first tell him this He better help carry Better help assist (help out!) Open channel, open door I’m teachin’ Home Break-In 101 on the floor But if you’re listenin’ Criminal hear this clear Touch one thing in that house And my crew appear Open channel, open door We save lives, that’s what this is for So sing along Lock it down Spread the word Change your code after every call you heard Dispatch clear Scene secure We good She clicks off Knockin’ on wood Whole town changin’ keys by night Hummin’ that tune ‘bout the open line life

This chart was electronically reviewed by Synthetic Medic Medical Center. Accuracy may vary depending on staffing, caffeine levels, and whether anyone actually read the note.